Hi Gina, Im new to writing Haiku and just started a blog to record my journey of learning. I've been thinking about this question regarding "up" or "away" and it seems to me, as Bill has alluded to, that it depends on whether your intention was for the secret to be retained (swept up)or disposed of (swept away). Of course, you could do both and have two haiku's! Cheers DAVID
hello David ... how nice to find you here ... ooo no to two haiku ... but the 'right' one ... so, spitting rain suggests discarding ... hmmm that would make it away ... thank you sooooo much for an intelligent thinking suggestion .. which has me thinking ... :) and welcome ! >>> Gina http://ginaseye.blogspot.com/ http://fyneartstreasures.blogspot.com/
Good one, Gina. But will the wind keep your secret?
ReplyDeleteheh thanks Bill ... any critique is most welcome you know ... do you think 'up' is required ? away perhaps ?
ReplyDeleteso nice to find you here >>> Gina
Hi Gina,
ReplyDeleteIm new to writing Haiku and just started a blog to record my journey of learning.
I've been thinking about this question regarding "up" or "away" and it seems to me, as Bill has alluded to, that it depends on whether your intention was for the secret to be retained (swept up)or disposed of (swept away). Of course, you could do both and have two haiku's!
Cheers
DAVID
hello David ... how nice to find you here ... ooo no to two haiku ... but the 'right' one ... so, spitting rain suggests discarding ... hmmm that would make it away ... thank you sooooo much for an intelligent thinking suggestion .. which has me thinking ... :) and welcome ! >>> Gina
ReplyDeletehttp://ginaseye.blogspot.com/
http://fyneartstreasures.blogspot.com/